Episode 279: Can Growing Up with an Almond Mom Affect Your Relationship with Food? with Dr. Katia Arroyo-Carrion

“An unhealthy relationship with food, it’s a mask. It’s covering everything. And we remove that, it’s going to show all of the cracked foundations, and then that’s when the real work begins.”

We talk a lot about our relationship with food as if it exists in a vacuum, but what if some of your food struggles are connected to your relationships and experiences with other people? In this episode, I’m talking with Dr. Katia Arroyo-Carrion, a licensed clinical psychologist and trauma specialist, about relational trauma and the ways it can shape how we relate to food, our bodies, and ourselves. And yes, that can include growing up with an “almond mom” who, even with the best intentions, reinforces restrictive eating and unrealistic body standards.

Dr. Katia explains that trauma exists on a spectrum, and it doesn’t always look like one big, obvious event. Sometimes the messages, criticism, or dynamics we experience in close relationships can leave us feeling inadequate, ashamed, or out of control, and those feelings can show up in our relationship with food. We talk about how behaviors like restriction, dieting, emotional eating, and binge eating can sometimes serve as coping tools or protective responses, rather than evidence that something is wrong with you.

I really love this conversation because it gives us a different lens for understanding food struggles. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” we can start getting curious about what our behaviors may have been helping us cope with. Dr. Katia and I also talk about the ways diet culture can reinforce shame and make healing even harder, and why finding the right support matters when you’re ready to build new coping tools and heal your relationship with food.

What You’ll Learn:

• The difference between small “t” and big “T” trauma, and how any relational trauma can show up in other areas of your life
• What an “almond mom” is and how that relationship dynamic can affect your relationship with food
• Why restriction, dieting, emotional eating, and binge eating can sometimes function as coping tools
• How to look at shame with more curiosity instead of treating it as proof that you’ve done something wrong
• How diet culture can reinforce shame, guilt, inadequacy, and unhealthy beliefs about food and body size
• Why it’s important to find providers who understand trauma and are willing to examine their own biases around food and bodies

I hope this conversation helps you connect some dots around your own food struggles and relationships. When you have the right supports in place, you can learn new ways to cope and replace self-blame with understanding and compassion.

Resources:

• Episode 133. How Noom Uses Anti-Diet Language to Sell a Dieting Program
• Grab the Hunger & Fullness Scale Guide at DietCultureRebel.com/hungerfullnessscale and take your next step toward building trust with your body and food
• Connect with me over on Instagram at @diet.culture.rebel

Struggling with food, but not sure where to start?

You don’t have to feel 100% ready to get support. If you’re tired of obsessing over food or feeling stuck in the diet cycle, my team of Registered Dietitians is here to help. We offer one-on-one nutrition counseling—and we accept insurance! Spots are limited, so head to https://dietculturerebel.com/insurance to see if we’re covered in your state and learn how to get started.